I failed.
Maybe I should back up and explain. Starting a blog post with "I failed" is quite melodramatic and a bit unfair, yet that how I feel . Let's start from the beginning.
On May 9th, 2014, I left my job as Director, Communications & Media Relations with the Portland Pirates, the AHL affiliate of the then Phoenix Coyotes. I won't get into why I left, but my time with the Pirates had come to an end. I had decided to go work at the camp where I had spent my summers from 2003-2012 in various capacities and that I'd definitely find a job in the NHL during the summer.
I didn't.
I had experience with the AHL during the NHL lockout, ran a department for a professional sports team starting at the age of 23, and had navigated some very difficult times with the Pirates, and yet I didn't get a job. I don't quite no why - I'm sure that there was more that I could have done that summer, but regardless, I finished my camp contract without a job to go to. So I returned home at the end of August, determined to head out on my own again.
Months passed, and still no full-time NHL job - or sports job, for that matter. I worked a couple part time jobs, including a month as a UPS Driver assistant (which was a great workout for the entire month of December), and had a couple of interviews, but no full time position was offered to me. I became discouraged, angry, and most of all depressed - Why was I not worth a full time job in sports? Was it my experience? The way I was applying? Or was it that no one was looking at my resume? These were the questions that kept me up at night.
It has been 11 months since I was employed full time - 11 months of job applications, living at the house I grew up in, and over 150 rejection emails. And yet, as I look deeper at the experience, my time out of the professional world has yielded a new outlook on my professional career. I launched 2 personal websites, including this one. I worked at jobs I never would have if I'd been employed full-time in sports. I applied for jobs that didn't fit my experience. I spent time with family. I drove my grandparent's car from Chicago to Naples, FL - and back. I visited England for the first time. The experiences I had during my unemployment helped me grow as a professional - giving me perspective on my situation, and the drive to keep pursuing my chosen career path.
I view this NHL season as a personal failure for me - because I was not able to work for an NHL team. With that said, this failure is not a negative - I have grown professionally and personally, and have more to offer an organization than I did last May. The important thing for me has been, and will continue to be the relentless drive to work in professional sports at the highest level possible. That's what gets me up in the morning, and that's what drives me everyday to apply and pursue my chosen career. And I know that, regardless of my current situation, I will be employed again.
I have to mention a few people that have impacted my unemployment - First, the #smsportschat and Tariq Ahmad, who have been immeasurably helpful in expanding my knowledge of the #smsports world. I've been able to connect with and chat with the professionals I hope to work with one day, something I couldn't have done without the weekly chat. I also have to thank Danny Kambel, who offered to chat with me after an #smsportschat - a very kind gesture that I hope to repay one day. Caity Kauffman, the Tampa Bay Lightning's Social & Digital Media Coordinator, wrote me an email last May that could not have been more helpful in my job search. Tim Bulmer, my mentor with the Portland Pirates, gave me the tools to be successful with the team. Jonathan Jick, my former intern, and Jake Moore, my former colleague and roommate, have been supportive throughout, with Jake offering me a one shot job with the NA3EHL in April. My family, who have helped me with applications and housing, have been nothing but supportive in my goal to work in professional sports again - I owe them more than I can ever repay. Finally, I owe Pirates fans who have reached out to me after my time with the team came to an end - your kind words have been a huge motivator. I know i didn't mention everyone, and for that I apologize, but please know that even by reading this, you are doing me a huge service. Thank you.